now i'm bound by
the life you left behind
your face it haunts my
once pleasant dreams
your voice it chased
away all the sanity in me
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**Bellybutton happiness!!!!** Friday, Jun. 13, 2003
23:23
:D I'm in a lot better mood today. I'm not nessicarily happy. But I've avoided a lot of my shitty friends and well wow things are going great cause I don't have a bunch of selfish assholes surrounding me.other good news. Bought astraea a mouse which she promptly named it kitty. Liam named his Liam. they are five. you think they would be a lil more creative then that. Anyways.I pierced my bellybutton on ...sunday night. Well I couldn't sleep for days and by Wednesday I couldn't walk normal and I sat with my gut all poufed out. So I took it out. I was going to wait just one more day to see if it got any better......but I couldn't I fought and fought to get the damn ball off for like an hour almost in tears. But I thought to mysself...the pain of having it in is worse then this.....anyways. the holes remained black...yesterday I found myself playing and picking at it. Yes I was one of those children that picked all their scabs off. I can never just let something heal....I always gotta push it. Anywyas.....it hurt like a bitch and then today it was feeling all so better...even with stinky puss coming out of it= also took leftover antibotiacs and alcohol helped make me scream a lil. I was watching tv tonight......peeled a layer of dried puss off the higher hole and then pulled at myself to look at the lower hole......long behold.....no black skin and I could clearly see a hole there. I thought that was cool. Hell one hour without my tongue ring in and I had to shove the bitch back in and that was months after I had it done. I didn't think too much of it....finished watching law and order went upstairs to hop on the computer and pee then off to bed. While I was in the bathroom I started to get the stuff out to clean the thing. Decided i wonder if my whole is still open.....ha! Well I tried entering from the bottom..it got about halfway through. I tried that way cause its easier to attatch a ball that way. then i tried the other way and I got all the way through....no pain no bother....besides the crank in my neck trying to see what i was doing. Of course it took me like 30 minutes to hook the ball on....a lot better now with the swelling down.....i'm actually thinking that it's better now and healed up and fighting the infection so I might be ok with it in. It doesn't hurt at all. I can't feel it. So I'm proud that all my pain that I endured is worth something. Next on my list....libret...only after I have established employment.....well off kids. Glad me and my bellybutton ring are back together again. Night.
Forget the Past ~*~ Hope for the Future
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