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*~*I'm Better*~* Monday, May. 12, 2003 14:55 ~big cheese~ Well let's see. I'm feeling better today. I'm trying hard to avoid all the drama and people that involve it. I don't need it and if people can't respect that then I'm just going to stop talking to them. I'll miss their friendship, but I have a lot of things in my life as it is, and I'm trying to make my life better. I don't need the other shit affecting me. I'm getting a job, starting school. I have to worry about Nicholas and a sitter and homework and making good grades and getting into the nursing program and trying to get into Mount Carmel's nursing program. So I'm done with the drama and anyone who is a part of it. I dropped off the last forms needed for my finiacial aid. I should be hearing shortly just how much I will get and how much I will need to pay.I'm really excited. I've made my resume today and it looks totally awesome. Makes me look kickass. So I'm going to try to get this job making 12 dollars an hour fulltime or at least part time. I think I should do it part time a few days a week so I dont' get overwhelmed. I'm really disappointed because I will hardly be with Nicholas and when I am.....I'll be wanting to sleep. I know this is going to be hard. But I also know that it's worth it and that I can do it. I'm going to do great and I'm going to try hard. School and my son is the most important thing to me right now. Sorry to my family and friends but I won't be doing things for you or spending time with you. I'm pretty much done with dating too. I don't have time for the games. LOL now I understand why people say they don't have time for a relationship. Unless I get involved with someone that understands me and supports me and we do not fight or have drama, it's not going to happen. I want to be in a relationship that's easy going fun and calm. I don't need the bullshit nor do i want to waste my time on it. Two years ago I prolly would have stuck with one of the idiots I had dated since Evan and just tolerated the crap thinking I couldn't do better or that it would get better. Now if they screw up in the behinning I'm done with it. I'm not going to wait around to see if it gets any better. Maybe over time I may see if things have changed in friendship. That's as lucky as anyone who screws up gets. I know I may sound like a bitch or whatever, but I'm sorry I have a life and things I want in it ever since I was little and I'm finally getting off and doing it and finally believe in myself and KNOW that I am going to make it. I'm not going to let anything get in my way. And.....I'm sorry but if I'm dating you and you lie or something then no I'm not going to listen to say you are sorry or expect you won't do it again. I don't have the damn time. And.....please guys dont' assume this is towards you. The people I somewhat talk about in here know if I'm talking about them or not cause I've already told them. And I'm no longer dating them so really they should know. PS....Make sure you check out "disclaimer" an entry a few pages back. And please comment and sign my guestbook so I know you've been here. :D Love you guys. Forget the Past ~*~ Hope for the Future Link me! <a href="http://sailorschica.diaryland.com"><IMG SRC= "http://sailorschica.diaryland.com/images/sailorschica.gif"></a> xx xx